We can run but we can’t hide. Everything always catches up to us, whether we choose to admit it or not. If we don’t listen the first time, it will reappear until we do. It will consistently sabotage all good things, for mold spreads should we not address it -anything rotten will contaminate all things around it. Enriching itself in the nutrients of that which is ripe. So if we don’t rid ourselves of the seeds that grow rotten fruit, we will continuously grow an unfruitful garden spoiled by rotten crops.
Hence, the importance of addressing negative emotions, understanding why it is they are there in the first place. How did they come about?! Why?! What is their origin?! Where do they reside?! What belief are they rooted in?! Answering all this questions will help release its influence on you… its power over you. Avoiding it, or better yet not questioning it, will only have you watering it, allowing it to grow and take over. Consuming you and all that you do.
So we first must acknowledge, that is, bring awareness to the emotion, feel it, understand it and embrace it. And when I say feel it, I don’t think and harbour on it, I mean actual feel, allow yourself to feel. Because feelings only really last 90 seconds, it’s our thoughts about the feeling that last and linger. But if we just feel it, understanding what feeling it is… sadness, hurt, disappointment… and then embrace it, welcoming it as lesson. Then we can process it, and ultimately let go of it. Because the thing with negative emotions, is that they are teach us something about ourselves. They are there to shine light on darknesses within ourselves. Things that we need to work on, things that we need to overcome and grow from. But it takes acknowledging them first, allowing to feel, even if we don’t want to feel.
Because why don’t we want to feel?! What is it that has us avoiding it or basking in it?! What it is that we are holding on to?! What is beneath it that we are unable to let go of?! And most importantly, is it of significance?!
Why?! Why do you feel that way? What brought about the feeling? What situation, scenario, circumstance?! In other words, what triggered the emotion? Now it is important to note, that it is the ‘what’ and not the ‘who’… because chances are that feeling has arisen before, and the ‘who’ was different. So the juice is the ‘what. What took place?! Not who did what… but what happened?! Because again, we are the ones feeling, no one makes us a feel a way, we feel a way. And we feel a way for events that transpire based on what transpired, not who. We can’t control who does what, we can only control is why it makes us feel.
What belief is behind it?! And is it a belief that benefits or hinders you?! For most, it does both. So the question comes down to .. does the bad outweigh the good or does the good outweigh the bad.
So this is a bit of deep diving… connecting the dots between occurrences. When was the last time you felt that way?! Again, what happened?! And why did those events have you feeling that way?! What is it that links the occurrences?! What is the underlying message?! And again, I can’t stress this enough, not who… but what?!
Ask yourself, is this something I want?! Chances are… no it isn’t, so there is a choice to be made. Because once examination is done and we know exactly why this feelings come about, we can choose to continue living with them or we can do things differently. We can adjust our behaviours and reactions, as we are consciously aware of what springs these emotions about. And that is not to say, they won’t come about, they most definitely will, as we are creatures habit. But if we actively choose to not engage with the thoughts that create these emotions, we will slowly begin to develop new habits… new perspectives… new ways of thinking and operating. Which will rid us of outdated thought patterns that doesn’t serve us, but actually hinder us.
And because, the only thing we can control is ourselves. The question is, what must be changed?! What can be done directly and/ or indirectly to create change?! Nor only externally but internally… and it’s begins within.
Because we’re the only one driving the car. Others are just passengers in your ride… how are you driving?! And how do you want to drive?! Better yet, how do you think you are driving?! Because those are all very different questions.
And so, it is a matter of taking action. Not being a victim… enslaved by our thoughts and emotions, but rather a master of them, such that we become untouchable… unfazed and unbothered. And note, it is easier said than done, but it is a matter of developing a strategy that allows you to pause, allows you to not internalize but rather provide perspective. And the strategy may differ from emotion to emotion, scenario to scenario, circumstance to circumstance, but it is all trial and error and learning what best suits you in a given situation. In some instances, the strategy may apt for in the moment action, eg. taking a step back, not reacting; in other instances, it may be preventive action, such as meditation and reflection. And some times we require both, and for the most part I think we do require both. The calming of the mind, allows for the calming of the being. But again, each one of us is different, and its really about discovering what works best for you and taking action.
Taking action in alignment with what you want and choosing accordingly; most importantly, following it through. Dor there are three ways a company profits or rather progresses, by either leveling up, doubling down or bowing out. Apply those same principles in your life.
From there, it is a matter of commitment. How committed are you to yourself?! To learning, growing and implementing, so that you become a better version of you. Evolving and elevating, rising your frequency in a world created by energy. For we are what we exude. And if all we do is avoid and distract, that is all we will get is avoidance and distraction. But if we heal and conquer, then we grow and prosper.