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Now this is an important one. Because letting go of people, habits and/or things, it could sometimes be overwhelming and uncomfortable. And not to mention difficult, especially when it has been such a part of your life. Integrated into your reality, so much so that you don’t see beyond. You don’t note the red flags. The strain and the drain. It literally become so embedded into your being that you accept it as life… as what it is. Until you get out and you note the difference.

But the thing is, sometimes when you get out it can be too late. The damage to your soul and your being has already occurred, so much so, that you lose all sense of who you are. Without any idea of how to get back to what makes you -you. Drained and exhausted. Lost and confused. Depleted. Without any idea where to start or how to find yourself again. It can be daunting and overwhelming. Lonely. Hence the importance of knowing when to let go.

And so these are the questions to ask yourself:

  • How do I feel? Good/Bad, Energized/Depleted, Controlled/Empowered, Happy/Sad, etc
  • Am I seen? Or overlooked?
  • Is it helping me grow? Or is it shrinking me?
  • Is there an equal exchange of energy? Or am I receiving less than what I’m giving?
  • Am I encouraged? Or discouraged?
  • Does it provide me peace? Or does it create chaos?
  • Is there is stability? Or is there doubt and insecurity?
  • Is it fostering independence? Or (co-)dependency?
  • Am I surrendering and allowing? Or am I expecting and directing?
  • Am I considered? Or am I judged?
  • Does it offer openness? Or is it restraining?
  • Does it allow for endless possibilities? Or does it restrict and confine?
  • Is it embodying my full potential? Or is it limiting it?
  • Am I tapped into my higher self? Or am I tapped out?
  • Am I present and connected? Or am I absent minded?
  • Do I have support? Or am I neglected?
  • Are my needs met? Or are they disregarded?
  • Am I being respected? Or am I being mocked and ridiculed?
  • Do I feel like myself? Or am I having to pretend?
  • Is it benefiting me? Or hindering me?
  • Does it provide value? Or does it discredit worth?
  • Does the purpose at play have substance? Or it is just surface?
  • Is an intention being fulfilled? Or is it an attachment?
  • How am I being treated/treating myself? Good/Bad, Valuable/Discrediting, Encouraging/Discouraging, etc.
  • Are my strengths being highlighted? Or are my weaknesses?
  • Is it offering a deeper knowing? Or is it questionable?
  • Is it benefiting my overall health? Or is it jeopardizing it?
  • Do I feel free in my authenticity? Or am I censored by judgment/expectations?
  • Am I accepted? Or am I devalued?
  • Does it allow for expansion? Or does it box you in?

And the list for sure goes on, but these are basis of questions that we must ask ourselves when in situations and circumstances. People, environments, habits/routines. As this is what will give you perspective on what and how things actually are, rather than, how we want them to be or think them to be. As it can be easy to keep on the rose coloured glasses, as oppose to seeing the hard truths. The ones we don’t want to face, but know they are there. Running from them, until they smack us in the face.

Because sometimes, we so desperately want something, yearning and longing, clinging to what we think to be true. When it in fact is nothing close to the truth. Most importantly, nothing remotely close to what we actually want or even what we need and deserve. And so, if the answers to the above questions embody the later, rather than the former, it is time to let go. Granted that, it is doing more disservice, than anything else.

So don’t block your blessings by keeping yourself stuck in a lesson. Learn the lesson and get out! As some things and some people are only meant to be part of a chapter or two, not everything is meant to stay and remain. No matter how bad we may think we want it, or that it is what we want, we must look at the effects and note whether or not its cause will sow rewards.

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