understanding love language

Understanding Love Language

We all love differently, perceive and understand it uniquely; some are affectionate, others are not; some enjoy praise and gratitude, while others require unrelated acts displaying effort. There some that require attention, others space; some are needy, while others demanding. There are so many variation to love… how to love… who to love… why and where we love.

Most importantly, it’s difficult to understand love outside of ourselves… outside of what loves means to us… outside of our scope of understanding what it is and how it is to love. Most of the time, we often fail to realize just how much love surrounds us, because we are so attached to our way of loving, we neglect to see how others are loving us. We place all sort of notions and expectation of what love is and isn’t, how it is or isn’t displayed. To the point, we even neglect to knowledge if we are or aren’t loving ourselves.

Love is such a misconstrued concept because of all that stated above. The fact that we place a definition prior to understanding doesn’t allow us to fully embrace what love is, what it actually is and what it means in it and of itself. Because love is unique, it varies in form, execution and relevance. And even so, our understanding of not only ourselves, but of others.

For everyone shows love in their own ways. Some may speak it, some show it and others accept it rather than refuse it. We all have our own love language. Illustrating how much we care about a person or situation by the acts that amplify love for us. And it is up to us to understand not only what love means to us, but what it means to those around us. You see, because as I said, we all show our love in our own way. We all understand it in our on way, to our own degree. There are those that can speak on love, that can express and articulate their emotions. They aren’t afraid of being vulnerable. They can tell you how they feel openly. But it is not to say that they do that with everyone, some can, and others can do it with only a select few. On the other hand, there are whose who can show love. They are unable to express into words what it is they feel, they may know it’s love, but unable to make themselves vulnerable to it. And that could be for whatever reason, culture, environment, being, and so much more; regardless, they all share the same inability to articulate themselves. And so they illustrate their love in different ways. They will clean for you, maybe cook you dinner, buy you a gift, call you to check in, etc… etc… They show you their love through acts. And within those, most will only understand love solely through act, rather than words. Because for them, they can’t fathom what power words could have over actions. And vice versa for those above, they prioritize… necessitate verbal expression over physical action. Because for each and everyone of us, it is hard to show love. To put ourselves in the position of such vulnerability, and so why only understand it through the ways in which we give it… offer it. And it is acknowledging that, the distinction, the being in how others love and to what degree, will have you understand them in a completely new way. Embracing and accepting them, placing you in a position to speak that same love language. Transforming yourself in the name of reciprocity. After all isn’t what what love really is?!

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