NUMB SERIES

Numb

Alright! I'm going to keep this super lax, conversational, at times diving deep and others just slimming the surface. There will be moments your mouth …

Background – Pt. 2

So, here is a bit of background, something I’ll dive deeper into later on in the story. But for now I’ll give you a quick …

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Vicious Cycle – Pt. 3

A lot happened throughout my upbringing which led me to this place of darkness, soullessness, it was a bit rollercoaster, consistent blows. Somewhat never ending… …

Front & Center – Pt. 4

Aside from the behind the scene noise, there was a lot happening front-and-center, like I said, I offered patience and understanding to those that didn’t …

Flip The Switch – Pt. 5

Now, because I’ve become such a master at hiding -concealing. I have this on-off switch… you know the one you push when enough is enough …

Bittersweet – Pt. 6

And just like that, there was a sudden shift… I stopped caring for the person I had to be for others and started realizing the …

First Time – Pt. 7

I just wanted to be free… free from all of it. And to be honest I didn’t care what form it came in or how …

Avoidance – Pt. 8

I was addicted to the rush, it was exhilarating… the feeling of nothingness, the escape. It was everything I wanted, freedom from feeling, from thinking …

Shit Got Real – Pt. 9

I did a lot of stupid shit, because I didn’t care. I became so reckless, I only cared to forget -to numb and nothing else. …

Betrayal – Pt. 10

For you can only deny for so long, you can only avoid for so long. Once you’re caught you’re caught, the gig it up, there …

Insignificant – Pt. 11

I saw just how ugly the outside world was, as if I wasn’t already dealing with enough, I was hit, not once but twice. First, …

No Purpose – Pt. 12

At that point, my parents were ready to talk. They were ready to confront whatever was bothering me, whatever I was holding in, but the …

Experimentation – Pt. 13

And so began the experimentation.. I revisited the whole scene, the drug scene, but it was different this time around. It was no longer a habit …

After Hours – Pt. 14

I never felt so free in my life, nothing mattered and everything was at your disposal, so long as you knew the right people. And …

Ironic – Pt. 15

It was ironic. I was looking for an escape to only find out there was no escaping -there was only masking. It was my life transposed in …

The Bat Cave – Pt. 16

As much as I was consumed and immersed in it all, I was disgusted by everything. There were no morals, no boundaries, no limits, and …

Love-Hate – Pt. 17

There I was tolerating a world I wanted no part of, witnessing people to things that disgusted me, things that went against every fibre of …

Behind The Escape – Pt. 18

As much as I didn’t want to be part of that world, I felt nothing. It didn’t phase me. I was so numb to everything. …

It Was Over – Pt. 19

It was a crazy weekend of partying, non-stop, once again I had pulled a disappearing act, Friday to Sunday -gone! No where to be found. …

The Opportunity – Pt. 20

And, there it was… the opportunity presented itself… the opportunity that ended it all. And, I took it! I didn’t care what would come of …

Bad Trip – Pt. 21

We walked and we talked… it was good, but it was a hell of a trip… a bad one. I saw my world caving in …

Consequences – Pt. 22

As I said, I was done. And, it didn’t matter the consequences, I had a way out and I had to take it. And, I …

Don’t Even Try – Pt. 23

So there I was in the Emergency Room under arrest. It was picture perfect! The cops interrogating me regardless of my condition, which was somewhat …

Feeling – Pt. 24

There I was in a hospital room handcuffed to the bed with two officers at the entrance of my room, one on each side, undergoing …

Arrested – Pt. 25

As the night went on, I became more and more aware of my surroundings, all the emotions were making their way into my head, my …

Shame – Pt. 26

As much as I was excited that Monday was only a few hours away and I would be able to go home, I dreaded it, …

Recovery – Pt. 27

The recovery process was torture, the body aches.. I could not sleep comfortably for days, I couldn't eat without throwing up, I couldn't walk... OMG! I …

Rehab – Pt. 28

As messed up as the whole situation was, everything fell together nicely. Because, I was high as kite when I got arrested, my defense was …

Bring on Life – Pt. 29

It was enough talking, listening and feeling, it was time to start acting, start actually implementing things… you know put the wheels in motion, get …

Healthy Substitution – Pt. 30

I had enrolled into back into dance, it became my escape -still is. It is my drug, my therapy, a way for me to release …

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